Hold up…
The nursery rhyme goes like this: “Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, all the King’s horses and all the King’s men couldn’t put Humpty together again.”
Everyone, literally everyone, thinks it’s a giant Egg-Man creature falling off a wall and cracking, right?
Well, you’re wrong!
Who decided Humpty Dumpty was an egg? Its not in the lyrics, and deciding he's a giant egg is quite a random leap for someone to make, and everyone else being like, "yeah, a giant egg on a wall. Of course "
— Holly Bourne (@holly_bourneYA) January 9, 2023
Think about it: A humanoid egg? Get outta here. Eggs can’t sit. And who decided to send the horses? What are they gonna do? Also, sending the WHOLE King’s Army seems like a bad military operation. And why does the king care so much about Humpty The Egg-Man? Maybe he’s got some dirt on the king.
The original Humpty story came out in 1797, and it’s been claimed that “Humpty Dumpty” is a phrase for being drunk or a short and clumsy person. If that’s the case, it makes a little more sense, but not complete sense. Sending the horses, once again, isn’t the move. Why are we involving the horses? Should have just sent the medic. Poor choices were made that day, ultimately resulting in an unnecessary death.
What the hell Humpty Dumpty is not an egg pic.twitter.com/xSbZXn9p0t
— Crazy Girl (@CRAZY_GIRL1000) July 29, 2015
The likely scenario is that the illustrator for Lewis Carroll’s book Through The Looking Glass included it in his book and just completely made up the fact that Humpty was an egg, and people just stuck with it for some asinine reason.
One more scenario is much much darker…
Some speculate that Humpty Dumpty was actually King Richard III, who ruled England at one point in time, and had a horse named “Wall”. Stupid name for a horse.
King Richard III was chopped up into pieces during the Battle of Bosworth Field after falling off his horse, Wall. Later on, Humpty was drawn as an egg, instead of a mangled corpse in a children’s book. Kind of like “Ring Around The Rosie” is about plague and the deaths.
I like option #3. Sorry if I ruined your childhood.
