Here we go! This is it! It’s happening! Halloweek has arrived! I love Halloween. I love the excuse to hang out in the front yard and interact with neighbors. I love the smiling faces of the kids as they run from house to house, across lawn to lawn. As a parent now, I love the smiles on the faces of my own kids, love that they cannot sleep the day before, in anticipation. And I love the opportunity to educate the next generation on the confectionary application of an idiom as old as time: “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” In this case, kids: don’t judge a candy by its wrapper!
Sure the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup is fantastic! Of course we all love a good Twix. Kit Kat? Ah, yes, please? Who would turn down a Kit Kat? That’s just lunacy! Nerds Gummy Ropes/Gummy Clusters, the SweeTARTS Ropes – dynamite, and to the costumed consumer of 2024, those are like printing money! But the aforementioned are also the easy way out when that doorbell rings this October 31st.
What good are we to the future of this planet if we seek out the tail wind at every turn, if we avoid the hard conversations down the path of least resistance? None. No good. That is the answer.
You might get a raised eyebrow or two, a groan of discontent from your doorstep as you drop into their bags one of the following. This list doesn’t boast the timeless sex appeal of other Halloween favorites. But in their quiet solitude, far away from the prying, judging eyes of their peers, the child will unwrap one of these…and he will thank you. Fearing public ridicule, he may never vocalize his newly rocked world of confectionary delight. In a perfect world, he would applaud you for your bravery, your courage in the face of an easier path, but do not be sidetracked by a desire for accolades, nor should you be discouraged in the face of their absence. Sleep well knowing that you have succeeded in life’s greatest aim – you will have left an indelible impression on the next generation. Yes, hand out these delicacies, and you will leave the Halloween landscape to come a better place than that upon which you now tread.
#1 – Reese’s Fast Break: Take your standard Reese’s PB Cup and shape it into a log, then add a layer of nougat beneath the peanut butter. What is nougat? I have no idea, but I want more of it, and your trick-or-treaters will, too!
#2 – Snickers Peanut Butter Squared: It’s got it all…caramel, nougat (there it is again), roasted peanuts, peanut butter, all covered in milk chocolate and pressed into a perfect square. Why stop at “squared?” Put two of these suckers together and go full on rectangle, or go the full sized route if you’re of the means, and your house will live in oratory around every child’s swollen sack of sugar!
#3 – Whatchamacallit: If you’re gonna hand out these babies, you’ll have to go all-in, as the Whatchamacallit is not offered in miniature form. But the bump to your reputation alone will be worth the increased financial strain to your Halloween budget.
#4 – Reese’s Take 5: Salty, sweet, crunchy…taste and texture perfected in a single offering. The Take 5 may be the world’s most perfect food. Just eat it. And then eat four more. If I had to choose just one, the Take 5, IMHO, is the king of confection.
#5 – Baby Ruth: Scoff at the notion that, just because she’s been around since the 1920’s, this candy bar is out of touch. There’s a reason Baby Ruth has survived on the landscape for over a century – it will never let you down. Will you ever say to yourself, “I’ve gotta have a Baby Ruth?” Likely not. But will you ever find yourself unsatisfied after consuming its goodness? No way. Like the best friend to whom you are not physically attracted, the Baby Ruth is always there for you.
Have a great Halloween, everybody!
